EngineerHer

We’re so close to November now, we can almost taste it. In fact, having recently developed a bit of a thing with my local Costa and their hazel and pecan flavours, I can definitely taste it.

So, if you’re not already being harassed to complete your end of year review, you already know it’s coming soon. And it can be a real pain, particularly if you suspect, rightly or wrongly, that what you write has very little impact on the outcome.

Regardless of how you feel about it, you can legitimately use this time to your own advantage. This is an end of year review, so let’s walk through an actual end of year review and see what we get.

What energised you?

What were the things you can look back on over the last year and think “wow, that was really great!”

Yeah, I know, you’re in November, or nearly there, and possibly nothing feels great. It feels more like clinging on by the skin of your teeth to the end of the year. Cos January has a magic wand to make everything perfect again, right?

Except, we all know it doesn’t. So, for your own sake, put some time into this.

Remember I spoke last week about how usually people leadership energises me? As, unfortunately, does my stupid daily walk for my stupid physical and mental health? (yes, I can get very grumpy about that walk, and it’s not always daily, but it stays on the to-do list)

It doesn’t need to be ongoing activities like that. It could be a particular project. An event you were involved in organising. An event you took part it. It could be as simple as a coffee with a colleague where you discussed something new.

The important thing is, it brought energy into you. You felt better after taking part. It felt like you had more bunce in your step.

When I worked in the steelworks, there was a sign over the entrance to the BOS plant that said “We want you going home as good or better than when you arrived”. Or words to that effect. Now that was linked to physical health and safety – but let’s apply it to your energy. What days did you come home and feel able to face the evening?

What drained you?

This part is less fun, but maybe more valuable.

It’s essentially the same as the previous exercise, but now considering what drained you of energy.

Now, draining isn’t the same as difficult. We’re engineers after all – none of us got into this career without expecting to use our brains… and problem solving is at the core of what we do. Some of the best days I’ve had have also been the toughest. Solving an issue under a ticking clock. Chasing someone for a decision and finally getting it. My personal favourite from over two decades ago was getting a permit signed in 3 hours when it took most people 3 days. (Persistence and stubbornness pays off!)

But there are days that drain us. Spending too long in the one meeting room is one for me. Seriously, I start feeling like the room is running out of air and I start to yawn. Not the best look in a senior level meeting. So even when I do have back-to-back meetings in the one room, I try and leave the room, even for a second or two between them.

It can also be doing rote work as I call it. You know the work that requires intense concentration but it’s almost data entry. Must be accurate. Has to be clear and legible (less worrying now that I type most of it) But endless and time consuming and ultimately boring.

Doesn’t mean I never have to do it, but I know I definitely need multiple walks on those days!

What is it for you? What costs more energy that it returns?

Did any boundaries survive?

OK that one is slightly tongue in cheek. But in January, we all start thinking along the lines of “This is the year I make it home before 6 every night” Or “This is the year I make it to the school play” Or “No phone calls after 5 this year”

You know the ones I mean, right? And in January, for the first week, when half the world is still comatose from Christmas and New Years and Solstice and Hanukkah and Kwanzaa and whatever else people celebrate in December – those boundaries can be easily held.

Many people are dealing with the shock to the system after a few days, or even a few weeks, off work. And getting back into the swing of things makes it easier to leave work on time and use the New Year energy to maintain our intentions.

But how long do they really last?

Did any of your boundaries last the year? If so, which ones. And if not, which ones lasted the longest?

For me, the usual one is “leaving work by X time”. And I usually break it by mid January. Some emergency or other come up and I stay 30mins later than I want to. But then there’s another emergency. Then there’s a meeting someone puts in that happens once a month but late in the evening cos we’re dealing with the US on this one. You know the way it happens.

And by the end of the year, that enthusiasm for leaving work on time has long since faded.

I will say though that every year, I get a bit better for a bit longer. So year on year, I see the improvement.

What are you no longer willing to do?

After all this, you should have a list of things that you need to remove from your life.

That late evening meeting? I messaged the organiser pointing out it was 8pm Irish time and they changed it. It wasn’t an issue, they’d just pure forgotten I was in a much different time zone.

The things that are on my list of things I am no longer willing to do? (All of these are from previous years, by the way)

• Anything more than a 45min daily commute. I did a 90min commute years and it was exhausting!
• Toxic managers – I’m very lucky with my current manager, but I have previously worked for people who made me feel like absolute shite on a regular basis. No more. I have more self respect than that.
• Cutting the cake. I know this one is a me thing, but being the only woman on a team of engineers very often means you are the one doing the office housekeeping. The cake cutting and serving. The organising of the cards. The booking for the office party. Not for me.
• Agreeing to a project just because I’m asked. A lot of the time we’re voluntold for projects, but when I do have a choice, I consider it. Is it something I’ll enjoy? Is it something that will help me in some way? Is this going to exhaust me for no personal gain?

Do you see the trend? We are not in full control of everything in work. But for the things we are, let’s set the boundaries in place and get better every year at maintaining them.

What you end up with…

Look, next year isn’t going to magically be different because 2026 changes to 2027. It’s not going to magically fix all our problems and worries and concerns and drains.

But we can at least enter the year understanding ourselves better. It’s not selfish to decide some things you will no longer tolerate or do. It’s not “being a team player” to be the team doormat.

It’s ok to say no once in a while. And knowing when it’s most important for you, personally, to say no? That’s information. Valuable, vital information so you can perform better at work, and in life.

I know these questions aren’t always easy to answer. Looking back over a year when you’re already feeling exhausted and miserable and just going through the motions is tough.

I know.

But I also know how much value you’ll get from this. And ok, yeah, sometimes we’re too close to our own situations to figure this out by ourselves. If that’s the case, give me a shout. Free, gratis, and for nothing.

But don’t let another year go by without changing something to make your life better.